DEA Agents Argument Against Medical Pot: Rabbits Are Getting Stoned


This DEA agent’s absurd argument against medical marijuana could perhaps be the strangest yet.

“I come to represent the actual science”- a bold way to open testimony that was to provide us with the clear danger of rabbits getting too high.

The moron giving testimony was Drug Enforcement Administration Special Agent Matt Fairbanks. His argument was that if Utah were to legalize medical marijuana it could have a strong recourse on the state’s natural wildlife. One of those threats: dazed and confused bunnies would be running amok.

Criminalization of Marijuana & Opium – The Racist History Behind The DEA & Prohibition

The DEA’s other argument against dismantling the overfunded and out of date agency is that thousands of people would lose their jobs.


Yes, someone actually took this dumb bitch seriously enough to put her into a position of power. When it comes to marijuana being a gateway drug, I’d argue that the DEA is making it a gateway drug by falsely reporting it’s dangers to the public.

 DEA: Marijuana Would Make Rabbits Too Stoned

“I deal in facts,” Fairbanks said during the completely absurd hearing last March. “I deal in science.” FOIA expert MuckRock requested that the government drug enforcement agency hand over all documents showing the effects of marijuana and it’s legalization on the rabbit population.

In a very brief reply to MuckRock, the DEA answered the question. There is absolutely no science or facts.

“After reviewing your request,” the FOIA letter reads, “no responsive records were located.” The absence of any documents doesn’t mean no studies on rabbits and weed exist (they do), just that none prove legalizing medical marijuana would cause bunnies to get high.

The reason for the hearing in March of 2015 was to look at cannabis’ ability to wreak havoc on local ecosystems-is something he says “no one has looked at,” as reported by TheDailyBeast.

Side note or not, Fairbanks’s bunny claims are worth revisiting, if for no other reason than a look inside a modern argument against legal medical weed. His theory stems from his time “up on [the] mountains” in Utah protecting the environment as a member of the DEA’s Cannabis Eradication Team.

The $18 million program relies on 120 agencies to demolish marijuana grow sites nationwide—a mission which is hugely successful. In 2014 alone, the program led to the eradication of 4.3 million marijuana plants, just shy of the 4.4 million that were eliminated the year before.

While digging up marijuana plants, Fairbanks apparently noticed that rabbits had “cultivated a taste for marijuana”—which he suggested was to the detriment of their brains. “One of them refused to leave us and we took all the marijuana around him,” Fairbanks said. “His natural instincts to run were somehow gone.”

Shortly after taking his post as DEA chief, Chuck Rosenberg delivered a half-baked rebuttal to medical marijuana. “What really bothers me is the notion that marijuana is also medicinal because it’s not,” he said. “We can have an intellectually honest debate about whether we should legalize something that is bad and dangerous, but don’t call it medicine—that is a joke.”

The statement incensed medical marijuana activists, patients, and congressmen, who viewed it as an indicator that the DEA doesn’t take marijuana seriously. In the wake of the statements, Rep. Earl Blumenauer, one of the most vocal opponents of the war on drugs, called Rosenberg an “inept, misinformed zealot.”

“Sadly, these actions by administration officials are indicative of a throwback ideology rooted in the failed war on drugs,which needs to stop,” said Blumenauer. It’s an ideology that led President Nixon to implicate everyone from Jewish psychiatrists to black and Hispanic men, and today leads people to argue that bunnies need protecting more than cancer patients.

But the DEA’s chief is not the only part of the agency that’s under fire.

In November, a number of House representatives filed a bill (PDF) asking Congress to strip the Cannabis Eradication Team of its funding, calling the program a waste of resources.

“As multiple states legalize marijuana across our nation, it is a huge waste of federal resources for the DEA to eradicate marijuana,” said the bill’s sponsor, California House Rep. Ted Lieu. “The federal government should focus its precious resources on other issues and let the states innovate in the cannabis field.”

As far as Fairbanks is concerned, the rabbits are safe—for now. While the state legislature did not agree with his theory, the bill (narrowly) missed the Senate. The lawmakers will debate the bill again this year, hopefully sans bunnies.

DEA Says Heroin Is More Dangerous Than Weed

I’m not sure if many of you watched the ex-chief of the DEA, Michele Leonhart, claim that crystal meth and heroin are worse for someone’s health than marijuana. Her lack of knowledge of the drugs of which she is enforcing is truly frightening. The actual reason behind the prohibition of marijuana stems to crazy levels of racism and small minded individuals.  senate that marijuana causes white women to seek relations with black men.

It wasn’t until late July of 2015, when the new Chief of the DEA, Chuck Rosenberg, admitted that “Heroin is clearly more dangerous than marijuana.” He said that it “probably” didn’t pose as great of a health risk as heroin.

Mexican immigrants referred to this plant as “marihuana”. While Americans were very familiar with “cannabis” because it was present in almost all tinctures and medicines available at the time, the word “marihuana” was a foreign term. So, when the media began to play on the fears that the public had about these new citizens by falsely spreading claims about the “disruptive Mexicans” with their dangerous native behaviors including marihuana use, the rest of the nation did not know that this “marihuana” was a plant they already had in their medicine cabinets.

The demonization of the cannabis plant was an extension of the demonization of the Mexican immigrants. In an effort to control and keep tabs on these new citizens, El Paso, TX borrowed a play from San Francisco’s playbook, which had outlawed opium decades earlier in an effort to control Chinese immigrants. The idea was to have an excuse to search, detain and deport Mexican immigrants.

That excuse became marijuana.

This method of controlling people by controlling their customs was quite successful, so much so that it became a national strategy for keeping certain populations under the watch and control of the government.

During hearings on marijuana law in the 1930’s, claims were made about marijuana’s ability to cause men of color to become violent and solicit sex from white women. This imagery became the backdrop for the Marijuana Tax Act of 1937 which effectively banned its use and sales.

While the Act was ruled unconstitutional years later, it was replaced with theControlled Substances Act in the 1970’s which established Schedules for ranking substances according to their dangerousness and potential for addiction. Cannabis was placed in the most restrictive category, Schedule I, supposedly as a place holder while then President Nixon commissioned a report to give a final recommendation.

The Schafer Commission, as it was called, declared that marijuana should not be in Schedule I and even doubted its designation as an illicit substance. However, Nixon discounted the recommendations of the commission, and marijuana remains a Schedule I substance.

In 1996, California became the first state to approve the use of marijuana for medical purposes, ending its 59 year reign as an illicit substance with no medical value. Prior to 1937, cannabis had enjoyed a 5000 year history as a therapeutic agent across many cultures. In this context, its blip as an illicit and dangerous drug was dwarfed by its role as a medicine.

[H/T TheDailyBeast]

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